I’m probably the last person on Earth to discover this. But this story and video should be a good palate cleanser for the heavy cancer talk yesterday.
Back in December, and Norwegian artist named Morten Traavik went to North Korea, where he visited the Kum Song school of music. He met some accordion-playing kids there, who apparently treated him like crap because he left behind an a-ha CD.
I mentioned on Twitter that my bathroom has become a place where ladybugs go to die. I do not understand. One of my podcasting cohorts (I forget which one; honestly, those guys are interchangeable except for the one who says he’s straight) suggested I had become a vengeful ladybug god that demanded sacrifice.
Those of you who are my friends on Facebook — it’s really the only way to get classic hilarious observations like “Jesus Christ it was cold when I was walking my dogs!” — you saw me bring in the new year with the following important question:
Who would win in a fight between Batman and Wolverine?
The results are in and I can confidently announce that my Facebook friends are smartasses. Stop the presses.
I also got some votes. In those votes, Wolverine won almost 2 to 1. Interesting.
My Facebook friends on Team Wolverine are forgetting one small detail…
Gonzo’s chicken must be very disappointed.
Unrelated Star Wars Questions: During Luke’s first long conversation with Obi-Wan in A New Hope, he (Luke) learns about the Jedi Knights. But in later movies, including the prequels, they are almost always referred to as simply Jedi. Is there a difference between a Jedi and a Jedi Knight? Or was the “knight” quietly dropped to avoid confusion with Baywatch Nights or Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights? Would the prequels have been improved with some dirty dancing? (“In a corner, no one puts Yoda!”) Or maybe Darth Hasselhoff?
Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman have taken enough shit from the people in Dublin.
I don’t know what the Dubliners have done to anger the Mythbusters. Maybe they all think the moon landing was a hoax? Maybe one of them forwarded an email about a can of biscuits exploding in a hot car? Or told the story about getting electrocuted by peeing on an electrified train track? Perhaps Adam and Jamie have laid siege to the town until they surrender the guilty. It’s difficult to tell.
I’m sure everyone in Dublin is googling “boiling pitch” right now and figuring out what sort of permits they need for a moat. They need not bother, because when the Mythbusters have decided you need to explode, you are fucked. Basically.
This could get ugly, quickly. To paraphrase FDR, “the only thing we have to fear is Dublin mayor Tim Sbranti having one-on-one combat with Adam Savage, just like that scene with Hector and Achilles in Troy, though less homoerotic, we hope.”
Tim looks like a man with some substance. Adam looks like a man with some explosives.
I’ve written to Mayor Sbranti to get his opinion on what happens next. How does Dublin respond? Will he retaliate with all the might of the Dublin PD? Will he conditionally give in to their demands, provided he gets a weekly massage from Kari Byron?
Can every week be shark week?
We’ll see if Mayor Sbranti is at liberty to respond. I’m sure the Mythbusters are monitoring his communications. I heard you can do that by just wrapping old mattress coils around telephone wires. I wonder if that’s true?
The road to Heaven may be paved with good intentions, but those intentions are delivered by a piece of shit Ford van. This is the philosophy with which I was raised, and I had it confirmed on my way to work this morning.
Complete with Baptismal Ladder
I think my favorite is “Bought by Jesus” near the door hinge. That’s one way to stick it to Bank of America. I couldn’t get a pic of the other side, but it says “rust spots by Satan” and “hubcaps swiped by homosexuals.”
I wish I knew what was inside. I hope it’s a lot of deep pile shag carpeting and a couple of forlorn hookers.
I think Siri is annoyed by me trying to teach her the Auburn fight song.
sigh…
Whoa, it’s been a week since I posted. When you have that “Friday” song as an earworm, it sorta stops all other activity.
I have several real posts in the works, but until then, let me show you what hell looks like when it bubbles to the surface and spreads over the Earth. In a can!
Facebook told me I should be friends with Rebecca Black. The Rebecca Black.
They can fly now?
What's that? You're safe on a boat? Hahahahahahah
I knew if we kept it up with that Shark Fin Soup bullshit, we’d regret it.
My mom worries that I SCUBA dive. It looks like I’m a hell of a lot safer than people who water ski.
(Here’s the actual story where I found this picture.)
UPDATE: Okay, I just had a mental image of Jesus walking on some water when Chewie there pops up.
Matthew 14
22: And Jesus did stand upon the waters and spake “Verily I say… what the holy hell is that?”
23: “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Ruuuuun!” For lo, did his sandals slap upon the waves as he legged it back to shore.
24: “Quit laughing, lest ye die.” Yet our mirth abated not. And Simon the Crunchy did gather himself into Heaven forthwith.